Today starts a new day; I realize that I have been abused by religion. It took me through Day 8, 9 before I realized this, but I am glad I did. You can go back to see my comments on Day 8 and 9 to see what I am speaking of. I am taking the time to do the exercises as outlined in the book; Recovering From Religious Abuse, 11 Steps to Spiritual Freedom written by: Jack Watts. While I know that hurt and abuse as described and presented in the book are two different things, I have come to the understanding that in regards to taking advantage of me I have in fact been abused. I will admit, one of my greatest concerns is I may have at times abused religion. I don’t think I have but this journey will help me understand where I am at and in the process help others as I journal each day with the steps outlined in the book.
One of the things I miss a great deal about my past is the location of where I lived. I loved the mountains, the ocean, places I love because the environment of my surroundings enabled me to come to a better, closer place with God by his revelation to me through nature. I miss that because as much as I love Kansas, there just isn’t the things I love like the above mentioned. I have to work at finding the time with God I need in an enjoyable, worshipful way. I have to work at it because in times of reflection and meditation I realize and see how much God is alive in me and I in Him.
While I am still relatively young in some ways, I can’t imagine retiring because I love to do the things I do. As I serve others I know I am alive, and God is alive through me. I value and enjoy the opportunity to live and breathe in the things that give me pleasure. In my own healing process, I have discovered that the more I live and allow God to live through me, the more satisfaction, joy and purpose I have in life.
I can’t help but think that as others find a way to spend time with God in the comfort area that best suits them, they will feel more alive, more blessed and more purposeful. For one who went for so long without those things, it is wonderful to live with a fresh view, fresh purpose, and fresh mission with a fresh, living, loving, God.
Abide in Me, and I in you, As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. – John 15:4, 5
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