This morning at 6:46 AM I likely got to speak to my mother for the last time. I received the call from my sister that my mother likely wasn’t going to make it through the day. I am typing as I prepare to leave this morning to go back to Upper East Tennessee alone. My story with my mother is long and complicated, I said to her though that I loved her, and that for her to not try to hold on for me to get to Tennessee. I told her that I would see her in Heaven. This was important for her to hear according to the Hospice nurse that handed me the phone. I don’t think my mother will be alive by the time I leave around noon today, and take the approximate 20 hour drive alone.
Ministry is hard, harder than many realize. I know my wife sent out a request in the last week or so to help with funds. It really kind of sucks to be honest, no money came in, I am leaving this morning, and the truth is, right now I don’t have the money to get home. I have enough to get there hoping there are no emergencies along the way. I realize times are tough, because they are tough on our family and this ministry. It just seems like things pour all at once instead in bearable moments. Our landlord who we were leasing our home with an option to buy just filed bankruptcy, go figure that one, then there are additional strains such as my son has a court case next week and we have been trying to reach him to detail the information to my mom and we haven’t gotten a return call, don’t even know if he has gotten the message. Then my doctors office withholds medication I need because I have to have some testing done which I haven’t been notified about, then to top everything off, I took our little wiener dog in yesterday to the humane society because he has killed some chickens, and has had an attitude, they inform us they can only put him down as opposed to giving him a chance. Yep, life sucks sometimes.
I don’t write this to complain, I write this to say there is hope. I know that, hopefully you know that. While I don’t know how I will get home, I know that God will work away and his will, will be done. I find joy in knowing that my mother in her later years made a real decision for Christ, a miracle I didn’t expect. My wife will stay at home to go to the trial with my son, and her recent surgery would have made the drive very hard on her, but things are the way they are. I’ll be honest, a little help getting home, covering the costs would be great, I just spent $125 I don’t have to get the car ready for the trip this morning. I will be mooching on people while there and am praying and hoping the funds come in while I am there to somehow be able to get home. I am praying for no tragedy or difficulty along the way, I am praying that my mom will pass peacefully and that today, she will enter the arms of a Christ who can forgive all sin, including the sins of a mom who had a hard time being a mom.
I will have The Virtual Pew phone with me, would love to talk as I can, the number is 316-258-3952. I am grateful for a lot of things, most of all a Savior who still provides, secondly a family that loves, and thirdly a ministry and group of friends who understand.
BTW, it is likely The Virtual Pew message boards and postings will be delayed for a few days, I hope you all understand.