Where do I go, what do I do, what do I say? I haven’t written anything for awhile for various reasons. I ask today, if you are a follower of Jesus, ask his Spirit to help you read between the lines today as I am being intentionally vague about some things, and brutally honest about others. If you aren’t a follower of Jesus, I just ask you to bear with this and try to understand.
The last few weeks have been busy. In fact, they were mostly great as my wife and I had the opportunity to be blessed to attend and see our son wrestle in the regionals and state finals. We didn’t know if we were going to be able to attend, pledges came in, and one small gift and we went on faith. It has been tough though because several of the pledges that came in several weeks ago did not come in and as a result, we have literally experienced some financial difficulties, those things add to the stress of a home.
The bottom line is our son won state and we were so proud of him. Most have no idea of the journey he has been on, on both a life and spiritual level. He is a great kid but has made some bad decisions in his life, of course others have been there to embellish “the rumors” and make life more difficult on both him and his mother and I. In fact, one such individual from the Kansas Wrestling forums decided to make negative comments about our son, as he has both he and I on local and national discussion forums under both his name and an assumed name, while we were away to visit my mother in Tennessee at Christmas. This person was not held accountable by the agency whose board he sits on and he nor the agency seems to care one iota about the damage those comments have done to our son and our family.
Nathan has gone through a lot as a young man, he has numerous scholarship offers on the table but he is facing some really tough times right now. Without going into much detail, Nathan is still responsible for his actions and while 90% of the things said in the past are not true, 10% is, and he should be held accountable for those actions of which he has been, but things have become complicated as of the last few days.
I again, won’t go into detail other than to say, pray for Nathan, that God would give him wisdom, protection, and that the Spirit of God would compel Nathan to do what is right. I also ask that you pray for friends for him. It is sad, I posted some comments at both MySpace and Facebook where many of his supposed friends are on my list and asked for them to contact him, as it was serious, the truth is, not a single one of his friends contacted him. Not a single one. Today’s youth are self absorbed and think little of others. I have seen others use others, and I have seen others take advantage of others in a way as to make themselves look better. Nathan is still in need, as are many of today’s youth of real friends. Not the fake kind, but the kind who goes out of the way to show love, give support, and offer advice, even when that advice may be something that is hard for the receiver to hear. To my knowledge, and I believe him, Nathan has never partaken in illegal drugs or anything like that, yet, I am reminded of the television commercial that says friends don’t let friends drive drunk, and has the one friend taking the keys away from their friend. In Kansas today we are hearing about a 19 year old college student at Kansas University that literally drank himself to death at a fraternity house recently. His father is on television pleading to not send flowers but instead to give up drinking. I am appalled that we live in a system and world that would think if funny to get drunk, and funny to do so with friends. I don’t want those kind of friends for my son.
Mary Jane and I are hurting today, we are grieving. We don’t expect much in our home, just give us respect, and obey the simple rules. Of course sometimes those rules change depending on age but we expect Nathan to finish school, be in class, make up work, and be home at a reasonable hour and to let us know where he is at in case we need to reach him. If not able to follow those rules, out of love, there has to be tough love, including the possibility of living someplace else. Recently those rules haven’t been followed and there are consequences for not following rules. Everything has to be done in grace and in love, but I long for my children to have a lasting and loving relationship with God. I long for them to have more than their mother and I have had unless they decide to make a ministry or vocational choice of service that would mean they have as little as we do financially but just as much in the joy of knowing and serving our God. Nathan has so much potential, he has so much that has been offered him, even from a college perspective, but that is worthless without finishing high school and seeking the things that God has for him.
We covert more than anything prayers right now. I don’t know how things will turn out, I just know that my God gives peace even when it doesn’t seem that peace is possible.
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