Triggers: The Music of The Electric Light Orchestra

Trigger! On first thought people can get confused by the word trigger. Is it something on a gun? Is it the unexplainable? Unrecognizable? A swelling of emotion? Something else? Or all of the above? For me it is all of the above but today I write about the emotions.

 As I sat this morning listening to a song by The Beatles, Free as a Bird, I was triggered. It wasn't about the Beatles so much but the talented Jeff Lynne, producer extraordinaire and lead of the band The Electric Light Orchestra. I realized there are several things in my life that are essential to my story that must be included. My story could not be told without the inclusion of Jeff Lynne and The Electric Light Orchestra.

 There was a time in 1974 that I was first introduced to the Electric Light Orchestra, (ELO). I had been out doing crazy things on the campus of East Tennessee State University in Johnson City Tennessee where I was going to High School. I was a Freshman in High School and was doing a multitude of the stupid things High School kids do, especially kids coming from a dysfunctional family, staying from one place to another, doing drugs he could afford, mostly huffing, and as confused, well as confused as one might expect. It was while coming home late one night, being high as a kite that I was at my grandparents house where I often stayed. Sitting up late, I watched this band perform an amazing rendition of Can't Get it Out of My Head and to this day, I believe the best rendition ever of Roll Over Beethoven. At that moment, even though I was as high as a kite, I was won over to the music of ELO.

 I don't know what it was other than their own ability to be unique and do their own thing. They weren't really copying anyone else's style of music, they were creating their own style. I started following the and listening to everything I could, be it, to this day some of my favorites from albums like On The Third Day, Eldorado, Face The Music, and others, but especially these three early renditions.

 In my own troubled life, I had moved from staying with grandparents on occasion, to wherever I could find a place to sleep, be it a baseball dugout,  an abandoned bowling alley, and ultimately with friends from couch hopping to a youth pastor, and the creme dela crème, the YMCA Homeless Transient Shelter in Erwin Tennessee. I had a bed, a boom box and a bunch of 8-tracks, including of course. ELO.  I remember laying in bed so vividly to this day, listening to the traffic driveing by while listening to the guitar riffs on Fire On High. Something about the sounds of ELO and night time traffic filled with sirens on occasions that still triggers memories. 

 I went to 3 different High Schools 6 different times from the 9th grade through eventually graduation in the 12th, all while listening to the music of ELO. Something else happened though. Just up the street from the YMCA on the corner of Tucker and Main Street in Erwin lived this hot lady, a few years older but nonetheless, hot as all get out, Mary Jane. 

 I was smart, I started showing up and visiting Mary Jane whom I had met at a church I started going to because another girl named Kim told my sister that I was hot. Kim and I dated for awhile, it was good, but after a tough breakup, I was lonely, and living at the YMCA. I was tired of Ragu spaghetti sauce over noodles cooked on a hot plate I wasn't supposed to have. What did I do after dating a few girls? What most anyone in my situation would do, I started showing up at Mary Jane's around supper time. We would sit down, eat, watch movies or television and over a bit of time start to fall in love. As Mary Jane would tell me some years later, the band we did a lot of making out to was ELO. There was nothing like a great band, a young man making out with a much hotter older woman along with the music of ELO that would give taste of Heaven.  

 Needless to say, a couple of years later Mary Jane and I were married. It was the shock of some in the community. This woman older than me, a school teacher and I, a guy who was homeless and left college early was getting married. Some 40 years later while sitting in my living room in Wichita Kansas, Mary Jane and I talked about how we had shown people that said our marriage wouldn't work. I'll never forget her telling me so emphatically, "Yeah, we showed them didn't we Mike?"

 The love we had, kindled in part by the music of ELO would grow. While there were setbacks at times, as there will be in any marriage, we both knew the importance of ELO in our love for each other. One night, some 35 or so years after we tied the knot, we were sitting on the couch. I told my Alexa, "Alexa play my music."  I honestly had no idea what Alexa was going to play when I told her to play music. This time as Mary Jane and I sat close together on the couch, she started playing Telephone Line by ELO. WOW!  Mary Jane wrapped her hands around my head and gives me a passionate kiss I'll never forget. Enjoying it, I ask, "Wow, what was that for?" She responds, "Alexa is playing our song. We used to make out to that song all the time."  Then showing that that once dumb poor street kid was still kind of dumb, I responded, "Honey, I used to make out with a lot of girls to that song." She back hands me as she should have and we both start laughing.

 We loved ELO so much that we made a pact that helped keep our marriage so passionate for so many years. We decided that anytime, no matter what we were doing or where we were at, that if we heard an ELO song we had to give each other a kiss. There was the KIA car commercial, it played it all of the time, it showed while visiting someone's house, or at a movie. All the time, over and over again.  We even went to see the movie I Can Only Imagine, well guess what? The movie starts off with an ELO song. Seems like we were kissing all the time and people wondered why, so we had to tell them about our ELO pledge to each other. 

 We had been together some 39 years and I had made a pledge about the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame. That is I would never go until ELO was inducted. Well the previous year they had been inducted and my daughter who lives in Ohio bought Mary Jane and I tickets to go because now, ELO was in the HOF. We were excited to go, so we did.

 While in Cleveland at the Rock N Roll HOF, I was frankly disappointed in a lot of ways despite being asked for my autograph as we went to go in. See, I'm a musician and know how to dress the part, even the long hair and long beard. Mary Jane just laughed about it. While in the HOF my back was hurting and I had to rest more than usual. Mary Jane on the other hand was complaining about a little tummy ache. We didn't think much of it at the time. We left disappointed in the HOF for all kinds of reasons and went back to our daughters. It was early in the week and each day Mary Jane complained a little more about her tummy. We left Ohio to drive back to Kansas because I had a concert on Saturday night. We stopped at Lake of the Ozarks to check it out and Mary Jane kept complaining more about her tummy hurting.

 We got home on Friday, I did my show on Saturday and Mary Jane didn't go which was rare. It was a night that I'll never forget as I was inducted as a Great Musician from the State of Kansas into the International Blues Hall of Fame. I came home excited, woke Mary Jane up to show her the plaque and tell her. She was so glad for me. We went to sleep and the next morning she complained more about her tummy. I told her I was taking her to the Doctor. She insisted she didn't want to go, but in a not so nice way, I told her she was going to the "damned doctor, you have insurance!"

 We went to the doctor the next day, and the doctor said she thought she knew what was going on but wanted to run more tests and wouldn't tell us anything. Mary Jane had an appointment that Friday at 9 AM. It was unusual to go with her but I told her, "honey, it's early enough in the day, I'll go with you and we can go have breakfast afterwards." That sounded good to her so that was the plan, but a plan that never happened.

 At the doctors office they did a scan of Mary Jane's tummy. From there they saw something and sent her immediately to the emergency room at St. Francis Hospital in Wichita. It was there that our nightmare begin. Mary Jane ended up being admitted to the hospital and would be there 5 of the next 6 weeks where she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. There was hope though in what was called the Whipple Surgery. They thought it was a good possibility that she would respond well to the surgery, even with it being as dangerous as it is. 3 weeks later they attempted the surgery.

 I'll never forget the 17 or so people in the surgical waiting room with us. I'll also never forget the surgeon walking out some hour and a half later to tell me they had to abandon the surgery. The cancer had grown so much that if they had continued the surgery she would have died. They diagnosed her at stage 4 and gave her 6 months at best to live.

Mary Jane fought hard, but I'm not done with ELO. It was 2019, now a year later and Mary Jane is still fighting and ELO was touring the United States. We applied through an organization called The Dream Foundation to get a scholarship to go to the Cleveland concert. I was now a full-time caregiver and bringing in zero income and the incredible doctors bills had us dramatically in the hole each month. Unfortunately, we were turned down. I didn't give up though. We were going to go on our Dream Date!

 I decided to get in touch with friends in Nashville Tennessee. The Bridgestone Center made great tickets available for us, my friend Jim Schulman from University High in Johnson City was now the Vice-Mayor in Nashville so he helped make things happen and gave us his parking place at Bridgestone, so close to the door. Then, well then, there was Facebook. I asked my friends to help make our dream date possible. Man oh man, how those friends came through.

 A lot of things happened, I could go into so much detail, but my wife of going on 40 years, this woman I had been with for 42 years and I were going on the dream date we never though possible to see the band we loved more than any other, Jeff Lynne's ELO.  There were people who had heard of our story. They came to meet us, talk to us, took photos.  Mary Jane insisted on getting a hat and t-shirt, she would wear them, until the day she died six months later, on December 22, 2019. 

 I sit here writing, literally with tears flowing down my face thinking of these memories, while listening to ELO in the background on shuffle, with by chance, Zanadu playing. The line comes up, "A million lights are dancing in the sky where you are." Not making that up. 

Triggers, I don't know, all of this today, as I approach November 20, this Friday, on what would have been our 41st Anniversary. Thank you God for the wife I had and ELO. Now let me live for the future, with whatever you may have for me, but I am sure, along with ELO. 

Please don't take this wrong,THIS IS NOT AN ATTEMPT TO RAISE FUNDS!!!!, but I promised my wife to do my own record, which has just been released but I promised to release hers as well. Everything is done except for the licensing fees for some of her cover songs. Prayerfully, those funds will come in someday to get that done, of which, 1/2 of all proceeds go to the Cancer Relief Organization in Wichita that helped us so much, Victory in the Valley. Thanks for reading, God bless you and thank you again Jeff Lynne and the rest of the cast of ELO over the years. Your music has made an impact, of which, my story couldn't be told. 

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Daily Devotional, Genesis Chapter 9 and 10. God Loves The Cities and There Are Many Nations Under God

 

Daily Devotional, Genesis Chapter 9, 10

God Loves the Cities and It's Many Nations Under God

In chapter 9 of Genesis we see the establishment of cities. I have lived in the cities but I have also lived in the country. There is definitely benefits to both, but when doing the work of God, there is so much opportunity in cities. There are those ministries, to people that we see Jesus involved in in the New Testament. For whatever reason, we know that often times people are drawn to the cities. People from all walks and with all kinds of needs. Unfortunately we see unrest in cities as well, we see this especially so as of this devotion, in America, we see riots, discord and rebellion. The one thing we don't see enough of is a turning to God as the answer to the worlds problems.

There is also a concept approached in chapter 10 that I appreciate here. We see that God is the God of all Nations, that in reality, many nations, not just one, is to be under the rule and direction of God. We often think, no matter where we are at in the world that it is all about us no matter what nation we live in, yet we can clearly see through scripture that God loves all people, of all nations. In church this morning I appreciated the comments of the pastor on this subject, while some of us are blessed, and should feel so to be in the nation we are, we must remember, we are only visitors here, our ultimate nation as followers of Jesus is the Kingdom of God, our brothers and sisters are in many nations around the globe, not just the one we live in. 

How should we see the needs of our brothers and sisters around the World, how do we contemplate their faith journey and especially so in conjunction with the reality that while we may have brothers and sisters who are citizens of other nations, we are all citizens of the Kingdom of God.

To see Genesis Chapter 9 and 10 Click the following link:

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+9%2C+10&version=CEV

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You can also check out Mike's Musical ventures by searching for Mike Furches and Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band.  Mary Jane's album will be out in September of 2020 and the Pastor Mike and Demon Slayer Blues Band album will be released in October of 2020

There are hundreds of postings so make sure to check out the archives. You can also contact me for a free audio book link of The Keystone Kid at mike@furches.org You can visit http://www.thevirtualpew.com/.

Hopefully, you will consider a gift to The Virtual Pew.

You can donate via paypal at mike@furches.org or cash app at $MichaelFurches

Now I get asked this quite often, Can we repost your blogs or articles? The short answer to that is, what an honor that you would ask, and by all means, spread the word. Here is our contact information

The Virtual Pew
1249 N. St. Francis
Wichita Kansas, 67214
Email: mike@furches.org

Click on the following links to learn more about The Virtual Pew

To follow Mike's Band, Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band, click the following link:

https://www.facebook.com/TheDemonSlayers 

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The Virtual Pew Blog

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We Need Your Help, Covid Has Impacted Our Ministry

 

This one has been a long time coming, but Covid has impacted the ministries I am a part of. Over the last number of years there has been support that has come in from individuals and churches to the amount of approximately $650 a month. Mary Jane and I supplied the additional $1,400 - $1,500 a month to cover costs. We had it, it was never a problem, so, we did it. 

 With Covid having such an impact on individuals and churches we are losing that $650 per month income as of this coming month. That means I will have to come up with that amount on a monthly basis. To be blunt, that just isn't possible. 

 The ministry of The Virtual Pew has been busier than ever, especially with individuals not being able to get out and depending more on online ministries.  I have done everything from meeting with people on a regular basis locally, to spending time online with those in need. There have been situations where I have taken my money, purchased groceries, helped pay for motel accommodations and then some for the homeless and others. I want to be careful about the specifics of things getting done and while I have admittedly been busy with music, I have also continued the ministry work of helping whoever I can in a reasonable way. In some situations, it may be marital counseling, in others it may be dealing with grief from the loss of a loved one and in others literally being available to help in other ways be it transportation, or some other way. 

 I had hopes that with the expansion of ministry recently, along with the music that I would be able to continue to support those ministry needs.  It has been very difficult. We lost approximately 1/2 of our donations some months ago, and as of this coming month, will loose all of those donations, I just can't continue on that path. 

Will you; can you consider helping on a monthly basis?  I may also very likely be looking for another resident in the near future but I will also admit, I don't want to, I'm not planning on running a housing program. Whoever would be considered has to do their part of maintaining the property and following through with things they have committed to do. I certainly don't have, won't take the time to do things that others have as an obligation when they stay here, frankly, if I had my druthers, I would stay totally by myself right, but the extra little bit of money to cover basic costs can help. It also helps if that person is taking their faith commitment seriously and making church and so forth a priority. If the person staying here does their part it can work.  I find it easier and less stressful just to live by myself than to have to deal with those types of issues. I'm a firm believer as to a resident, if they can't take the time to be actively involved in church and Bible study, it is best to live someplace else, or, I live by myself.

Anyway, please consider helping, and if possible on a monthly basis, this is a ministry Mary Jane believed in, there have been areas that she would be proud of that have continued since she went to Dance with Jesus.

 You can give a tax deductible donation to Mosaic or you can also contribute to The Virtual Pew at paypal at mike@furches.org or via cash app at $MichaelFurches.  You can also mail donations to 1249 North Saint Francis, Wichita, KS 67214. 

Thank you for considering helping this ministry out.

 Click here to follow The Virtual Pew on Twitter

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Click to subscribe to my blog

You can also check out Mike's Musical ventures by searching for Mike Furches and Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band.  Mary Jane's album will be out in September of 2020 and the Pastor Mike and Demon Slayer Blues Band album will be released in October of 2020

There are hundreds of postings so make sure to check out the archives. You can also contact me for a free audio book link of The Keystone Kid at mike@furches.org You can visit http://www.thevirtualpew.com/.

Hopefully, you will consider a gift to The Virtual Pew.

You can donate via paypal at mike@furches.org or cash app at $MichaelFurches

Now I get asked this quite often, Can we repost your blogs or articles? The short answer to that is, what an honor that you would ask, and by all means, spread the word. Here is our contact information

The Virtual Pew
1249 N. St. Francis
Wichita Kansas, 67214
Email: mike@furches.org

Click on the following links to learn more about The Virtual Pew

To follow Mike's Band, Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band, click the following link:

https://www.facebook.com/TheDemonSlayers 

The Movie Guys

Donations to The Virtual Pew

The Virtual Pew Blog

Reviews With Mike

The Virtual Pew Sermons

The Virtual Pew News

Daily Devotion: Genesis Chapter 5 and 6. Ancestry and Super Heroes

 

Daily Devotion:  Genesis Chapters 5, 6

 Ancestry and Super Heroes

 In today's reading Chapter 5 starts off with something that many tend to overlook when reading the Bible, genealogy.  We do the same thing in life, well at least most of us do until we get older. We tend to not focus on, be concerned about or search out our own history. Thankfully in today's world we are seeing some changes in that due to things like ancestry dot com and DNA research.  Prior to my wife's death, early on in her diagnosis with Pancreatic Cancer, I decided to invest in a detailed DNA test and research into our Ancestry.

 We learned fascinating things.  It was like her 10th great grandmother who was a passenger on the Mayflower, and my 10th great grandfather was the pilot of the Mayflower. The fact that our relatives likely knew each other was a fascinating thing to us. There were other things, like one of Mary Jane's grandfathers, being John Sterling whom Sterling Castle was named after where Mary Queen of Scotts was christened and King Richard the 3rd or 4th being one of my grandfathers and Henry the 8th being a distant relative as well. Ancestry while interesting is a part of defining who we are and where we come from.  A fascinating part of Jesus ancestry shows that not only King David was a part of his lineage, but so was Adam and Eve.

 While there is a lot who will debate the story of Adam and Eve and the history there, I find it fascinating and them being a part of the listed genealogy of Jesus is meaningful to me on various levels.

 Another thing that stuck out to me in today's reading is the Nephilim who were supernatural beings who bred with women on earth, and them being described essentially as "super heroes."  Personally I am fascinated and would like to know a lot more about these beings and their offspring as we just don't have that much written about them in the Bible. Anyone knowing of other reliable texts that may tell more about them, I would like to know as this is one of those things that keeps the Bible, for me, far from being a boring read.  Of course I like reading The Contemporary English Version when reading because of the easy to understand translation and the way it was translated. That said, wouldn't you like to know more about this species of creature? Is it angels, is it something else and how were they like super heroes?

The rest of Chapter 6 starts to get into the story of Noah. We see how far human kind has progressed, or regressed in the time frame from the point of creation to the point of Noah.  We see again, just like we saw earlier, God will only take so much before he acts. He is tired of what humankind has become and even contemplates the total destruction of the earth except for one who was faithful, Noah. How faithful are we in today's world to loving and serving God and others?  How many times will God show through scripture that he will only put up with so much?  Of course we know some of what is coming next and in the future, but until then, keep enjoying the read and thoughts.

 To read these chapters click on the following link:

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+5%2C+6&version=CEV 

 
Click here to follow The Virtual Pew on Twitter

Mike Furches on Faceboook.

Click to subscribe to my blog

You can also check out Mike's Musical ventures by searching for Mike Furches and Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band.  Mary Jane's album will be out in September of 2020 and the Pastor Mike and Demon Slayer Blues Band album will be released in October of 2020

There are hundreds of postings so make sure to check out the archives. You can also contact me for a free audio book link of The Keystone Kid at mike@furches.org You can visit http://www.thevirtualpew.com/.

Hopefully, you will consider a gift to The Virtual Pew.

You can donate via paypal at mike@furches.org or cash app at $MichaelFurches

Now I get asked this quite often, Can we repost your blogs or articles? The short answer to that is, what an honor that you would ask, and by all means, spread the word. Here is our contact information

The Virtual Pew
1249 N. St. Francis
Wichita Kansas, 67214
Email: mike@furches.org

Click on the following links to learn more about The Virtual Pew

To follow Mike's Band, Pastor Mike and the Demon Slayer Blues Band, click the following link:

https://www.facebook.com/TheDemonSlayers 

The Movie Guys

Donations to The Virtual Pew

The Virtual Pew Blog

Reviews With Mike

The Virtual Pew Sermons

The Virtual Pew News

 

 

An End Of Life Dream Date With Jeff Lynne's ELO

The link to the article on my other page is as follows:  https://mikefurchesreviews.blogspot.com/2019/07/an-end-of-life-dream-date-with-jeff.html

Click on the link to check it out, it is well worth it.

For Better or Worse

Where do I start?  Mary Jane and I first met around 1976 - 1977, in 1978 we begin our relationship and married in 1979.  The day of our wedding was supposed to be a dual celebration. We were going to get married, and on the same day, celebrate her mother, Ruby, and father Ed's 50th wedding anniversary. Unfortunately Ruby died prior to the wedding but we still wanted to honor them on Tuesday November 20, 1979.  

It was a small wedding, some folks were shocked we were even getting married as Mary Jane is a little older. Not that much and not uncommon in a lot of circles and certainly the longevity of our relationship and marriage has showed many of those people, wrong.  Now a days I feel at times older even though she is fighting pancreatic cancer. I have pains from years of sports like football, soccer, basketball, boxing, and the one that did the most damage to a never little boy, running. The pounding has me with a horrible back and the rupture or tear of an Achilles heel that never had surgery doesn't help.

Truth is, for the overwhelming majority of our marriage it has been great, there have been tough times though, like the stupid period of my life where a lesser woman with less love would have divorced me. Some think success is a way to build a relationship but I learned that success to the level that I was experiencing it was taking time away from my family which had me doing some pretty stupid things. Mary Jane though, while life has not been perfect has been as close to a perfect wife a I could ever have. While I have great regrets at times for my stupidity, in the end, I know how blessed I have been to have this mountain girl, coming from a Christian family and a strong faith in God in my life to help me recognize my weaknesses and keep me growing in my faith. Mary Jane has in essence, been my balance to keep me grounded and from doing stupid things.  I honestly don't know how I would have made it without her.

In my book, The Keystone Kid I write about some of this, my stupidity, my life which was miserable in so many ways and the way God used her to bring about a real love in my life. While I had the love of God in my life, although I still struggled with it at the time, I needed an example of what it meant to be a Godly. Because of the abuse I went through I needed a physical example of love. God used Mary Jane in a mighty way to show me physical love and real love from a human perspective.

Lately, it hasn't been easy. The cancer takes its toll. There are days that are not good, days that I resort to in some ways the person I used to be. I want her to live, I have fussed at her to do the things she needs to do to stay alive, to have a chance to beat this thing called cancer. In all of that, and in the times I reflect on the love we have had and still experience, I have shed more tears in the last months than I have in my previous almost 60 years of life. Some people don't understand that, they make judgments, all I know, is that as Mary Jane can verify, the doctors and nurses keep telling me to keep on doing what I need to do as whatever it is, is working.  It was only a few weeks ago that I was wondering if we would see one more Christmas? Would there be life that was recognizable for Thanksgiving?  Truth is, right now we think there is hope, we know for Thanksgiving, we are praying for continued progress for Christmas. And we are really praying for at least one last trip together with our friend The Praters to Lake Tahoe later this year.

There are still hurts though, hurts that drive me crazy like realizing the situation my wife is going through, after all, it is pancreatic cancer. There are those we love the most who have let us down, they still find reason to not be around, few of those reasons in my opinion are justifiable when understanding the situation Mary Jane is in. There are things I don't understand, things I can't accept because of the love I have for my wife and the sacrifices I have seen her make in life for others. She has made incredible sacrifices with little recognition of what she has done. From the mother she has been to her children, the unconditional love to her grandchildren, to the 39 years of teaching in public schools because that is where she felt God would have her despite her talent and ability to have been able to make it in the music ministry industry and world. She has given so much to the Mentally Ill, to develop appropriate race relations in the middle of a prejudiced world and then to providing so much for the homeless. We have housed prostitutes, prisoners right out of jail, misguided musicians, and I could go on and on, to sometimes housing just people having a rough spot in life. She has given literally tens of thousands of hours and dollars, she has put her pocketbook and calendar to the test of love. Yet, at the same time being robbed, being called names she didn't deserve and have others we have shown love to stab her/us in the back and never shown appreciation. We have had people living with us, helping them for at least 35 years of our 39 years of marriage, 40 years of being together. I challenge anyone to show that type of a lifetime of work. The most incredible thing though, she has endured and put up with me for 40 years. That contribution is not lost on me.

People say they have the best wife, I don't deny that as I think that God provides soul mates if we look for them, surrender to Him and then are obedient to the concepts of marriage as outlined in the Bible. People don't succeed because either they don't have a relationship with God, or they are unwilling to follow His guidelines. As an example, prior to my wife's illness, I still took her out on weekly dates, I still prepared meals for her, I still opened the car door for her and many of the other things you do in a dating, falling in love relationship. Many find excuses to not keep doing those things and then wonder why their marriages fail. I took seriously the scripture that I was to love my wife in the way that Christ loved the church. While I am not perfect, that command has a lot of weight to it.

Enough of all of that, today we won't be able to go out on a date due to the weather and chemo, we can't go out to a restaurant and eat due to the possibility of catching an infectious illness, there is a lot we can't do, but, we can sit together, watch a movie while holding hands. We can share a kiss and say I love you. We can experience love outside of the physical way we have in the past because that isn't always possible with cancer either. I can do other things though like get up and fix her a bowel of cream of wheat which she is wanting for breakfast. Wait a second, I better get up and fix that cream of wheat, after all, it is our anniversary. 

To see Mary Jane's performing my original song, Dancing with Jesus, click on the following video or link.  Note the video will not be available until after 5:15 CST November 20, 2018

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfDmV_MHelI

If you would like to help with our ongoing medical costs and living expenses, check out our gofundme page a the following page link, or you can click on any of the photos:  

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BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR OUR NEW CHILDREN'S BOOK, HAROLD THE ANGEL, NOW AVAILABLE  AT AMAZON, BOOKS A MILLION, BARNES & NOBLE AND OTHER MAJOR RETAILERS, OUR BOOK THE KEYSTONE KID IS ALSO STILL AVAILABLE AT MOST MAJOR RETAILERS AND IS A TERRIFIC READ.

The Virtual Pew and our other work is supported solely by the kind contributions of others. You can click on the donate button below to give any amount to this work that does so much more than just post articles on the net; I draw no ongoing salary from the church I pastor, Mosaic Wichita which is predominantly a homeless church; I am grateful for any small amount you can contribute to help with this ministry.  Believe me, there is much more going on than most realize. I will also provide information to verify the ministry and income that comes into this ministry and work.  Thanks and feel free to share any material from The Virtual Pew, I only ask that appropriate credit is given and a link to the original site with the materials provided.

Click here to read about, and order the book, The Keystone Kid

You can also order the book at all major retailers, including Amazon, Barnes & Noble and so forth. It is available via e-book for .99 Cents or if having a way to download, can download the full audiobook at soundcloud.com and simply going to Mike Furches / The Keystone Kid. The audio version of the book is available for a free download.


Click here to visit the web page The Virtual Pew

Click here to follow The Virtual Pew on Twitter

Mike Furches on Faceboook.

Click here to visit Mosaic Church where Mike is Pastor

The Keystone Kid/Virtual Pew Message Boards

Click to subscribe to my blog

There are hundreds of postings so make sure to check out the archives. You can also contact me for a free audio book link of The Keystone Kid at mike@furches.org You can visit http://www.thevirtualpew.com/.

Hopefully, you will consider a gift to The Virtual Pew.

Now I get asked this quite often, Can we repost your blogs or articles? The short answer to that is, what an honor that you would ask, and by all means, spread the word. Here is our contact information

The Virtual Pew
1249 N. St. Francis
Wichita Kansas, 67214
Email: mike@furches.org

Click on the following links to learn more about The Virtual Pew

The Movie Guys

Donations to The Virtual Pew

The Virtual Pew Blog

Personal Furches Web Site

Hollywood Jesus

Reviews With Mike

The Virtual Pew Sermons

The Virtual Pew News

A Caregivers Confession, Half of Me Wants To Live, Half Wants to Die

There is so much going on in life right now that it has prevented me from posting in The Virtual Pew for awhile. You see, my wife Mary Jane is at stage 4 of pancreatic cancer and we don't know what the future holds. I have earned about being a caregiver and what is going to follow is a confession of sorts and a cry and plea for help and understanding in other ways.

I have found, that some of the only people who truly understand are others who have either gone through the battle with this thing called cancer, or those who have cared for them.  Others, often including family, have no idea and the support that come from some is life saving and the judgment from others that have one at times wanting to give up and just die themselves.

Here is the truth, something I have always tried to share, I find myself between the battle ground of wanting to die and end all of this, while at the same time feeling that way, and wanting to live. I find myself at times, doing so much that I don't care if I take my own medications and at other times, thinking I want to live to fight this thing and have some life of solitude when it is all said and done. I am afraid more times than not that the desire to just die is going to win out.

My last doctors visit was not good, my blood pressure was 187/128, everything that was supposed to be up was down and everything that was supposed to be down, was way up. In short, I am a walking heart attack right now. Little sleep, high stress, and everything else adds to my own issues. In all of this, I can't tell you the tremendous guilt I feel just sharing this as doing so makes me feel selfish, greedy, uncaring and more, in part, because I have seen and witnessed the judgment, judgment for things like, yes, yelling at my wife to follow doctors orders because if she don't she surly dies.  You see she has a chance to beat this thing and the doctors and nurses have affirmed I am doing something good in helping her and making her do whatever she needs to do, be that eating, drinking or whatever. I have seen the consequences and results of being transported by ambulance to the hospital because her blood sugars drop out because she is not eating, I have had to deal with Chemo Brain (a concept I never knew about until this,) things like pouring protein drink on her feet while she is watering her flowers, or so she thinks, times that she doesn't know the names of her children and can't think of my name, things like pouring vomit down the bathtub, and I could go on and on. Some of those most critical of course are among the very first to tell us, "If you need anything, let us know." Yet, when you ask them for help, to sit with her for a bit, or something else, they can't be found. I could go on and on here, but will leave it at that, but all of these compounded with everything else is, let's say, sometimes beyond bearable.

Right now, I want to live, this is a clue to that as it is a sort of crying out. I am reminded this Thanksgiving that there are those who do care, from a far, and some from close by, that have gone out of their way to see to it that we have a great holiday together as a family. A holiday together that could be our last. Yet, there are also those who do harm. I could say more, maybe someday I will, but my wife and I, both college educated with degrees and living in the real world together for 40+ years are not stupid, we have been observing the writing on the wall for some time.

Then we know there are others, family and then some from around the globe that sincerely tells us they wish we were closer, we believe them because over the years we have seen their words put into action. For them, we are thankful, your thoughts and prayers we covet because we know the one you pray to and we know the sincerity of your hearts.

Bottom line, yep, it sucks being a caregiver, I sometimes think and believe it would be easier to be the one dying. Like the Apostle Paul, I truly understand the concept that to die is gain.  I know there are those who will say things like, "hang in there she needs you."  I know that, but she needs me more than ever because so few are willing to do what is necessary to keep both of us going.

Again, caregivers will understand, they have been through the depression, the loneliness, the feelings of being overwhelmed, the thoughts that the ones they love would be better off without them, the thoughts that they can't do it anymore, the judgment that is pressed upon them by those who have no idea, and I could go on, and on, and on.

What will the future hold?  I have no idea, I am fighting to see what today will hold, what the next few hours will hold. I don't have that much time to worry about, or think about tomorrow.

I’ll leave it at that for now, other than to say, if you are a caregiver, I understand. If you know someone who is a caregiver, give them the support, the love they need. Try to understand and the best way to understand is to be there if at all possible. Otherwise, be cautious about being critical of those going through these tough times, as the old saying goes, "…..until you have walked in their shoes."

If you would like to help with our ongoing medical costs and living expenses, check out our gofundme page a the following page link, or you can click on any of the photos:  

Go Fund Me

Check out our Twitter page at #dancewithjesus2

To subscribe to our Facebook Page, click here: Facebook The Movie Guys

To subscribe to our Youtube page click here: Youtube The Movie Guys

BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR OUR NEW CHILDREN'S BOOK, HAROLD THE ANGEL, NOW AVAILABLE  AT AMAZON, BOOKS A MILLION, BARNES & NOBLE AND OTHER MAJOR RETAILERS, OUR BOOK THE KEYSTONE KID IS ALSO STILL AVAILABLE AT MOST MAJOR RETAILERS AND IS A TERRIFIC READ.

The Virtual Pew and our other work is supported solely by the kind contributions of others. You can click on the donate button below to give any amount to this work that does so much more than just post articles on the net; I draw no ongoing salary from the church I pastor, Mosaic Wichita which is predominantly a homeless church; I am grateful for any small amount you can contribute to help with this ministry.  Believe me, there is much more going on than most realize. I will also provide information to verify the ministry and income that comes into this ministry and work.  Thanks and feel free to share any material from The Virtual Pew, I only ask that appropriate credit is given and a link to the original site with the materials provided.

Click here to read about, and order the book, The Keystone Kid

You can also order the book at all major retailers, including Amazon, Barnes & Noble and so forth. It is available via e-book for .99 Cents or if having a way to download, can download the full audiobook at soundcloud.com and simply going to Mike Furches / The Keystone Kid. The audio version of the book is available for a free download.


Click here to visit the web page The Virtual Pew

Click here to follow The Virtual Pew on Twitter

Mike Furches on Faceboook.

Click here to visit Mosaic Church where Mike is Pastor

The Keystone Kid/Virtual Pew Message Boards

Click to subscribe to my blog

There are hundreds of postings so make sure to check out the archives. You can also contact me for a free audio book link of The Keystone Kid at mike@furches.org You can visit http://www.thevirtualpew.com/.

Hopefully, you will consider a gift to The Virtual Pew.

Now I get asked this quite often, Can we repost your blogs or articles? The short answer to that is, what an honor that you would ask, and by all means, spread the word. Here is our contact information

The Virtual Pew
1249 N. St. Francis
Wichita Kansas, 67214
Email: mike@furches.org

Click on the following links to learn more about The Virtual Pew

The Movie Guys

Donations to The Virtual Pew

The Virtual Pew Blog

Personal Furches Web Site

Hollywood Jesus

Reviews With Mike

The Virtual Pew Sermons

The Virtual Pew News